I have been wanting to post about this for over a year and a half. Little did I know, God had more to add to the story; more than I ever could have imagined. In fact, it probably really wouldn't have been a story if I had had it my way. But I loooove the story now. Oh, the lessons God has taught me over the last year and a half.
To start, I have Poly cystic Ovary Syndrome which basically means your ovaries produce cysts instead of doing what they are supposed to do. I was diagnosed just before becoming pregnant with Garyn. I started a medicine to just regulate my cycle and stop the cysts. After being told all the infertility issues that typically go along with it, Tyler and I decided to not prevent and became pregnant with Garyn a month after starting the medicine. Needless to say, we were
a little shocked and wasn't expecting it to be so easy!
Fast forward 2 years or so......we decided to start trying for number 2. Quickly, we saw those infertility problems we thought weren't going to effect us. God, as well, showed us
we were not in control. When a year passed, we started some fertility drugs. At the same time, God continually reminded us that He was going to bless us on His time. One particular sermon a few months ago, showed us that God can choose to eliminate all other possibilities for something to happen other than himself to receive full glory. After church, we both said that could be what God was doing with us. The doctors were telling me they didn't understand why the fertility medicines weren't making me ovulate
{I say doctors because 3 months into the fertility drugs my main doctor sent me to a fertility doctor} Out of the seven months I took the fertility drugs that are supposed to make you ovulate, I only ovulated twice.
By the time, I took the medicine the seventh time, I was frustrated, hurt, depressed at times, and feeling God didn't want me to take the medicine anymore. I was putting too much faith in the medicine and not enough in Him. Even though, I knew God was ultimately the decider, I just felt the medicine should at least make me ovulate and was mad at when it didn't. My
Honduras trip was the beginning of an eye opening experience God was about to take me through.
To make a long story
(and a little-too-much-information-story) short: when I arrived in Honduras, I realized I needed my medicine while also discovering I once again was not pregnant (it was not a daily med, just certain days of the month). Unlike normal, I wasn't upset; didn't cry or get mad.
I felt at peace. I can't explain it but I trully felt God take the burden off my heart and allowed me to let it go. I also took it as a sign that God obviously didn't want me to take the medicine. There was no way to call Tyler, no way to go to Walgreens......no way I was going to be able to take the medicine that month. The whole week, I felt comforted
the few times I thought about it that no matter what happened, I was going to be just fine. In fact, being there with all the orphans made me
feel so selfish for being caught up in my own misery the months prior.
A month later, I took a test and was completely shocked! Although, I felt God had intervened in me not taking the medicine; I thought that was the lesson to be learned.
Trust God and start being content in His will. However, I was blessed in the process with a positive test. Four positives actually! I had taken so many that showed negative, that I just couldn't believe I finally had a positive!
Tyler and I had said the whole month, "Wouldn't it be crazy if this were the month I got pregnant?" We knew God would want us to tell the story to never forget what He had done for us. And it's not crazy, it's God. He can do anything, even after the doctors are
speechless and don't know why the medicines aren't working. Even after you have spent 19 months trying to get pregnant with no reaults.
( I know so many more have tried much longer than this, and I feel for them or you. ) Now, He has
all the glory for this child growing inside me. He eliminated any other possible reason for me to become pregnant.
So I tell you this
story with great excitement and great praise to God. I hope you can see what He has taught us and apply it to your own circumstances that you may be facing. It has been a
journey for sure, but I would rather not have it be any other way than God's way.
Today, I am 9 weeks & 2 days and was able to see the baby's heart beat and even movement! I realize I have a long way to go
(31 weeks to be exact) but I feel God will help me through the next chapters of this story. I just have to remember this journey!
And Jesus looking on them said, With men it is impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are possible. Mark 10:27
